Exile on Wilshire
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Escape from L.A.
I’m leaving.
In a little over a week, the movers will be here to whisk me and my stuff to…well, I don’t actually know where yet.
But I’m getting the hell out of here and NEVER coming back.
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Unengaged Wisdom
Have you seen this story yet? Long story short: groom jilts bride two days before the wedding, bride sues him to cover wedding costs, and she’s not the first to do so.
I’ve broken off two engagements. I, of all people, know everyone has a right to change their mind - especially when it comes to a huge, life-altering issue. But I have to say I’m backing the bride on this one.
There’s a common misconception that all women dream of their wedding day from early childhood and all want a huge, lavish party. This really chips my nail varnish. Not only did I never once think about getting married until I was well over 18 (and I’m not the only one), but both times I got engaged, I just wanted to quietly slip off to Vegas, have an Elvis impersonator officiate, and tell everyone after returning home. Guess what? Both times, it was THE GROOM and NOT ME who threw a fit and insisted on a “proper” wedding - family and friends in attendance, flowers on the tables, a big fancy cake, blah blah blah. (Given that both guys also turned out to not be marriage material after all, I’m starting to think that in the future, I should only accept a proposal if the prospective groom is willing to elope.)
The first guy was a cheat and a liar. He never even loved me - he just wanted a big family and thought I’d make a good mother. Should I have had to cover the entire cost of the big, fussy wedding HE wanted? Of course not. Thankfully, nothing had actually been planned/booked/bought at that point.
The second guy was willing to compromise on a very tiny wedding. BUT…I finally had to admit to myself that he was not the guy I wanted. He was willing to leave his family, friends, and hometown behind to be with me…six thousand miles away in another country. I realized I couldn’t ask him to do that when I was having second thoughts. What kind of a monster would that make me, especially if we could easily have wound up getting divorced? If he had actually moved out here only to have me break it off, I would have considered myself liable for his immigration expenses and lost wages - for the obvious reason that it would have been entirely my fault for not ending it sooner. Anyone who sacrifices their career or moves for their fiance(e) only to be tossed aside SHOULD be compensated. It might encourage more prospective grooms (and brides) to make damn sure they know what they’re doing BEFORE getting engaged.
Breaking off an engagement is not easy, but BOTH times, I managed to swallow my pride, ignore the heart palpitations, and end it before getting in too deep. If I can do that, so can anyone else.
P.S. Total wedding-related expenses incurred in two brief engagements: $35 for the crinoline I was going to wear under my dress.
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“I’ve made up my mind… Today I’m going to introduce myself to that little red-haired girl…”
Guys: girls feel this way, too.
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Food Fascism on Main Street
Was I ever happy to discover that two vegan-friendly food trucks, Mandoline Grill and Dosa Truck, were both parked at the weekly food truck lot on Tuesday night, within walking distance of my job. The lot doesn’t always have a vegan-friendly truck, and food trucks rarely come this close to the beach, so I like to go out and show my support when they’re here.
First I ordered vegan nachos from Mandoline Grill. They’re not authentic at all (Mandoline Grill is Vietnamese-style, so their nachos involve tortilla chips, your choice of protein - in this case, lemongrass tofu - minced scallions/mint/cilantro/jalapenos, and topped with spicy aioli - vegan on request). But who the hell cares? They’re delicious and innovative.
After I ordered and stepped aside to wait, the woman in line behind me asked the girl at the window about the nachos, threw a hissy fit upon being told the tofu is deep-fried, and stormed away, giving ME the nastiest and most disdainful look I’ve ever seen in my life.
Aaaand…the food fascists strike again.
Having been vegan for a good long while now (six weeks shy of 8 years), I’m a big supporter of vegan living. You want to grow all your own veggies? That’s awesome (I am so inept with living plants that I somehow managed to neglect a cactus to death). Going raw? That’s cool, too. Want to be a junk-food vegan? I would never call it ideal, but at least it’s humane.
I really dislike all the petty, snotty in-fighting in the vegan community. I am also none too fond of people who throw tantrums at vegan-friendly eateries because they’re paranoid about a little oil. (People like this are primarily found in LA and every other city with really sick levels of body fascism.)
I am not knocking people who need to avoid fat for medical reasons - my dad ate way too much crappy food for over 40 years and is paying dearly for it now - but for most of us, eating ONE greasy meal once in a while isn’t harmful.
Our bodies need SOME fat. Too much isn’t a good idea, of course, but it’s not wrong to indulge every so often. I can make brown rice, black beans, and kale salad at home. When I’m out and about, I like to try things that are too hard to make in my abysmal apartment kitchen - and as it happens, I don’t plan to ever obtain my own deep fryer. I also like to show vegan-friendly businesses that I appreciate their efforts to accommodate me. (Mandoline Grill is extra awesome for using separate equipment and utensils AND getting it perfect every time. How many chain restaurants with veggie burgers use the same nasty grill as the cow burgers and then overcook them to the consistency of hockey pucks?)
Never mind that IT’S A FLIPPING FOOD TRUCK. What was she expecting, plain steamed tofu and mixed baby greens? Very, very few trucks offer what I call “rabbit food”, in spite of LA being a major center of a) the gourmet food truck trend and b) extreme body/diet fascism, which I’ve railed against before.
You want to live on rabbit food and be a twig? Good for you. But do NOT throw a fit because not all veg*ns want to do the same thing, or because food trucks might like to offer vegan options that even the most diehard omnivore might like. How many omnivores think plant-based diets are tasteless, boring, and scary? If offering really delicious fried tofu can reverse that (and it’s the best fried tofu I’ve ever had), I say fire up the fryer.
Shrugging off the nasty look that sad old stick figure gave me, I enjoyed my nachos without any guilt - and a samosa from Dosa Truck as well. After that, it was back to eating whole foods…and back to packing up my apartment. I really can’t wait to find my next job and get the hell out of LA for good.
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Here for the Food
“You’d think they’d have a bottle opener at this thing,” Tony Yanow (founder of Tony’s Darts Away, a bottle-free, low-waste beer bar with a vegan-friendly food menu) said to me as he popped open my soda using the cap of a malt vinegar bottle.
In spite of the fact that I don’t drink, I just had to go to the first-ever LA Vegan Beer Fest, held last Saturday at the Roxy. Not only did a portion of proceeds go to ARME, but there were some fantastic food vendors, half of which I hadn’t had the chance to try before. I skipped breakfast, bought a VIP ticket (which allowed me to enter early) and proceeded to slowly eat all of the following:
Vegan cheese fries with chipotle ranch dressing from Fresh Fries
Vietnamese nachos with lemongrass-marinated tofu from Mandoline Grill
Avocado taco and potato-jackfruit taquitos from Seabirds Truck (one of many reasons I need to move back to OC…love them)
I wound up being too stuffed to visit the Frankenstand (which I do all the time) or Doomie’s (but Doomie’s opening a new restaurant next month anyway), let alone Yalla Truck (their falafel is good, though).
To my pleasant surprise, I wasn’t the only person who wasn’t drinking. I have nothing against responsible consumption of alcohol, but drinking is not my thing and I sometimes feel out of place at events that involve booze.
I wanted to go early in part because I’ve seen events involving copious amounts of beer go bad quickly. May as well get in and get out before anyone gets hammered, I thought. As it turned out, no drunken antics had taken place when I left at 4:30. The other attendees were actually tasting and discussing the merits of the 50+ beers (from 20+ craft breweries) on tap. It was a far cry from the wild parties my hard-drinking ex-roommate used to throw…and no one gave me any grief about being there for the food!
I did feel kind of weird for another reason - it was held on my ex-fiance’s birthday.
OUCH.
Vegan event with awesome food? He’d love that.
Lots of vegan beers on tap? He’d have loved that, too.
Live music from five different bands? Right up his alley.
Held at the Roxy on Sunset, where John Lennon used to hang out way back in the day? He’d have been in paradise.
I felt a little guilty…until I found out he just got a new job he really wanted and is dating someone new. I’m going to be out of a job in a few weeks (damn this economy) and am still all alone.
Damn it all.
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”French settlers in Los Angeles have tended to keep a low profile and to shed their separate identity.
- Excerpt from Los Angeles A to Z: An Encyclopedia of the City and County.
Well, damn. If French settlers in LA can’t be loud-and-proud, no wonder France-bashing isn’t seen as bigoted and hateful in mostly-diverse, mostly-tolerant LA. Prejudiced scum in LA can expect some backlash for slamming the city’s large Mexican or Chinese communities (never mind that Chinatown was a French neighborhood first…), but no one calls bullshit on anyone who picks on the French. (This may have something to do with the fact that the book states the current French population of LA to be around 45,000. Granted, it was published in 1997 and is out of date, but the French community is simply not very big. There is tremendous strength in numbers.)
Stuff that. This French-Californian girl is damn proud of her roots and will NEVER, EVER be shy about it.
P.S. Interesting article on why the Hollywood sign isn’t lit - and shouldn’t be.
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The Best Damn Cupcakes Ever
I just made the most awesome autumn/Halloween/Day of the Dead cupcakes EVER.
Procure a copy of Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World. (Trust me, it’s worth buying. I’ve tried every recipe except for the banana cupcakes - I’m allergic to bananas - and every single one is a winner. Omnivores are always shocked to discover they’re vegan…and then ask if I have any more.)
Make the Pumpkin Chocolate Chip cupcakes, but don’t make the cinnamon buttercream. (Also, I replace most of the fat with applesauce. You won’t miss the fat, trust me - they still come out perfect every time.)
Instead, make the Dulce Sin Leche caramel glaze. You will have to soak the saucepan for a while, but it’s worth it.
When the glaze is on the cupcakes, top with a light sprinkling of cinnamon.
I can’t believe I didn’t think of it before. They are SO GOOD with the caramel and cinnamon.
P.S. Keep your flour in the freezer or fridge - your baked goods will taste much better and will be safe from insects.
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Q: Just read your post about your trip to Laramie - my home town. I live in Northern California now though and could never live in Wyoming again. I laughed a lot when I read your account of getting there on the plane. I never fly in when I do go. And your post explained exactly why. Just wondering, does your friend still live there? Have you ever gone back for a more relaxing visit? It was a great place to grow up, but you couldn't pay me enough to live there now. Thanks for the trip down memory lane!
A:
She’s moving to Denver. I really can’t get away from the big city too often (I sure didn’t have time to drive there, hence the scary plane trip), so I don’t think I’ll go back anytime soon. But, it was a good weekend :)
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Day Trip: Highland Park
Yes, Highland Park. It’s that neighborhood on Highway 110 (aka the Arroyo Seco Parkway) between downtown LA and Pasadena.
Arroyo Seco Parkway is the first freeway in the USA (opened 1940) and is part of the former Route 66. It really hasn’t changed much since the old days, so enjoy the scenery (and the cool late-Deco tunnels), but for heaven’s sake, drive CAREFULLY. It’s very narrow and much more dangerous than a modern freeway.
My first stop was Cinnamon, a vegetarian Mexican restaurant. Don’t let the gang tagging and numerous broken parking meters on Figueroa Street scare you off - inside the restaurant, it’s clean and calm. Most menu items can be made vegan, and the empanadas are incredible.
Heading north on Figueroa, what did I see peering down from a rooftop but Chicken Boy? I’d heard the statue had found a new home, but hadn’t bothered to find out where. (Chicken Boy, for all you non-Angelenos, is a 22-foot high fiberglass statue of a male human with a chicken head, holding a bucket, that originally towered over a long-shuttered fried-chicken restaurant downtown. As a vegan, I don’t approve of eating chickens, and the moral dilemma posed by a chicken-headed human figure selling dead chicken parts is pretty bizarre. I mention spotting Chicken Boy because the statue is part of LA’s cultural history. Which straddles the fine line between “really sad” and “really disturbing” if you ask me. Incidentally, Chicken Boy was made by International Fiberglass, which was based in - where else? - Venice Beach and made countless giant fiberglass statues - Paul Bunyan, Muffler Man, Miss Uniroyal and many more - which can still be found all over the country.)
On I went to Galco’s Soda Pop Stop, a specialty market with a firm focus on old-fashioned and hard-to-find sodas. It’s the only place where I’ve been able to find China Cola (they even have the elusive cherry flavor, though I prefer the original) and Dry Lavender Soda (yes, lavender soda…). Oh, and the service is excellent. Not only did the nice older gentleman who boxed up my soda carry it out to my car, he opened the door for me. I always appreciate old-fashioned politesse. (Veg*n gross-out alert: Galco’s used to be a deli and there is still a deli counter in the back. Avert your gaze if large hunks of dead animal bother you.)
Off I went to my last stop, Figueroa Produce. Do try a vegan deli sandwich - they even have a separate slicer for the vegan ‘meat’ and ‘cheese.’ (Again, there is gross dead stuff at the deli counter.) I’d heard the store sold LA’s best guacamole and salsa, and neither disappointed. It’s also a good place to stock up on Daiya, Teese, Gardein, and Tofurky pizzas. (The owners are reportedly opening a second market called Organix in Eagle Rock, with a stronger vegan/raw focus.)
I would never live in Highland Park (too hot and smoggy - I was wheezing the whole time), but it was a good day out.
Likes
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“I’ve made up my mind… Today I’m going to introduce myself to that little red-haired girl…”
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“We live in a society exquisitely dependent on science and technology, in which hardly anyone knows...”
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Excuse me,
You’re standing on my neck.
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An Issue of Self Respect.
I am so sick to fucking death of guys with girlfriends hitting on me....
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Today, I saw heavier woman dancing alone to music.
Two teen girls were sitting in front of me....
